1:1s
Arguably one of the most important things an EM will do, 1:1s are a vital part of my day to day.
Why are they important?
1:1s are a great way for you to get a pulse on your team, both at an individual level and at a wider team level. They allow you to build trust and rapport with your team members, get a sense of general morale, provide feedback and set goals/expectations with them.
How do I conduct mine?
I follow some general principles for my 1:1s to make sure both me and my team members can get the most out of the meeting.
Keep them regular
1:1s are a way for you to check in with your team. This means keeping them to a consistent cadence. There are a few factors that can affect the cadence of your 1:1:
How long you've known each other - If either you or your report are newer to the company/team, this may warrant you scheduling more regular 1:1s to build that rapport and to get to know each other. Conversely, if you have a long standing relationship, you might not need to meet that often.
Seniority in the role - Similar to the the previous point, if your team member is more junior, they may require more regular check ins to get feedback or coaching.
Performance - If your report is placed on a Performance Improvement Plan (PIP), then you will likely need to schedule more regular 1:1s to discuss their performance.
Work assigned - If your report has been assigned a large project or feature that is of high risk or importance, then you may want to check in more regularly to provide support and give feedback along the way. This is especially important if they are taking a leadership role for the first time.
There is no correct cadence and duration for your 1:1s. For me, I tried to keep it to 1 hour a week per report but for others it might not be feasible given the size of their team and the scope of their work.
The most important thing is to make sure that your 1:1s happen. If you need to reschedule, communicate it early and go out of your way to find them a slot.
If it cannot happen within the regular time window and you have to miss a 1:1, make sure to engage with your report asynchronously.
The goal here is to show them that you respect the meeting and their time.
It's just as much their meeting as it is yours
It takes two to tango
As an EM, your team and reports benefit a lot from 1:1s but in order for that to happen, both you and your report need to be bought into the process. As with any relationship, either personal or professional, if one or both parties are not fully invested in it, the chances are it wont succeed.
What can your reports get out of 1:1s?
They have a dedicated time with you - I cannot stress how important it is for you to remember this and for you to let your reports know this. It's important that they know that they have your undivided attention. This means no phones on the table (if in person), camera on where possible and not doing other work on the side.
Feedback on their performance - They can come to you for clear and concise feedback on their performance. They may want to know whether you feel they made the right call in their system design or whether they handled a conflict correctly.
Clearer understanding of their role - As the face of the company's management, your word is what your reports will rely on to know whether they are doing a good job or not. This will ultimately lead to whether they get promoted or how much bonus they get as you provide feedback upwards on them during performance review time.
One thing I like to do is take out the company's competency matrix for software engineers and have a discussion on some recent things they've done and whether it aligns to what the company expects of them at their grade.
A safe space to discuss their thoughts and feelings - It's important that for your reports to know that they can come to you to discuss things in a professional and safe setting. If they share their feelings about the company's direction or how they feel about a recent conflict, your job is to listen and not to judge.
Come prepared
Coming prepared means both you and your report can get the most out of your dedicated time together. How can you both come prepared?
My sample template is coming soon!
Come up with some questions - To follow on from the template, its a good idea to spend 15 minutes before the meeting to come up with questions you want to ask each other or conversation points (e.g. the major project they are leading or a point of conflict you noticed within the team earlier in the week).
Actively listen
Your report is often there to share their thoughts and feelings and to give a summary of how their week is going. In general, if you catch yourself talking more than asking questions, you could be listening more to what they are saying. This shows that you are engaged and are actively understanding and absorbing what they are telling you.
Talk about more than just work
This doesn't mean that they should be coming to you with non contextual personal problems all the time. But what this does mean is to get to know them as a person outside of work. Take time to know what motivates them, what they do in their spare time and to understand what kind of person they are. This could be as simple as spending 5-10 minutes at the start of your 1:1 asking what they did on the weekend.
How can they go wrong?
No one comes prepared - If one of you comes unprepared for the 1:1 it will make the conversation very lopsided and not intentional. The key is to buy into the process and always try to go back to what you both can get out of this meeting. Once you remember the benefits, you will make the effort to come prepared.
The meetings start to deviate from their original purpose - This could happen for a few reasons:
It turns into a meeting where your report complains about their team members or always brings up conflicts and disagreements had
Your report starts to focus too much on personal issues that are not related to work
As stated above, one or both of you come unprepared for the meeting
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